Girls, if you let a man's penis in your vagina, defecate in his bathroom

why doesnt the country have a big giant car wash, to raise the money to fix the economy

Hey Obama, Draft Bush and send him to Iraq

I don't hate Bush as much as alot of you guys do, but it would be really funny if Obama did it

if ya feel like it, join this group I created on Facebook

Sully Sullied!

Sully dropped 11 points in popularity today after photos released on internet showed Sully fellating and sharing what appeared to be a bong with a horse . Representatives for Sully claim the waterpipe contained tobacco and not marijuana as originally reported.

in college, Jon Daitch was a fraternity brother of mine and a roommate at ZBT..as my girlfriend and I lay in 1 loft and Daitch in another - Jon would sometimes play this album and we would all wear hoods and sing ..Jon was later a roommate in ny -not exactly a roommate - as there were 4 people in 1 room (one of them is now Jon's wife - Maryse)..then I moved to L.A. for a year, then back to NY and I lived on Jon and Maryse and Rob's couch for several weeks..Jon helped me put together a resume, I applied to the show - then I headed to live in the parks and waited to hear back from the resume..I did, and the rest is history ..anyway Jon is one of the most creative talented people I know/who also has the ability to get things done - he can play keboards by ear..the way I am talking it sounds like Jon is dead - godforbid, take it back tsst tsst tsst - but thankfully he is alive - I consider him one of my closest friends - anyway - he liked ELO..

4 people who seem exceptionally nice when they come on the show

I have often been asked, who is the biggest ass or who is really nice - off air - when they come on the show..here are 4 people that stand out...

James Brown...he seemed to make a point to give a friendly hello to everyone in office..now whether he was reallly a nice guy, who knows, he did have rumors about hitting and I think shooting some former girlfriends/wives..but when he came on show he was always really old school polite and nice..one of my favorite James Brown stories - he owned or rented some office space down in Georgia ..and on his floor another business also had office space..there was a bathroom on the floor, but the bathroom was supposed to just be James..but the people from the other business were using his bathroom - so, one day, James walked into their boardroom while a meting was going on, shot his gun into the air and announced to them "Stop using my bathroom"

Drew Carey..whether its out of insecurity or just plain niceness this guy was so nice - I remember him in the green room - this was years ago , back when I was an intern or just starting out and I think I was carrying a box and he asked if I needed help moving the stuff I was carrying around and when I said no thanks, he asked in all seriousness if while he was waiting to to go on the show if there was anything he could be doing to help around the office, answer phones, etc

John Stamos like James Brown, Stamos always seems to make it a point to give everyone a hello and I am not just talking the obvious, Howard and Robin, I am talking everyone from receptionists, interns on up, very complimentary, very nice...I also probably have a softspot for Stamos cause people always get us confused lookwise and think I am him and vice versa

Dave Chappelle..there is just something so sweet about the guy, and I am also talking times I have ran into him on street years before I met him thru the show..I've also always felt a sadness about him.cant pinpoint it, exactly but you want to hug the guy
(and no I am not gay, I am going to go have sex with a woman right now)

milking Salma

"...The actress and producer was told by doctors in Sierra Leone that many mothers stop breastfeeding their infants within the first few months after birth because of pressure from their husbands. Tradition has it, in some areas, that it is not acceptable to have sexual relations with breast feeding women..."

moments later, Salma F'ed the childs father

video from last year when I applied to be on the ParisBFFshow

Week 5 Required Video - video powered by Metacafe

Octomom strikes deal with Whole Foods to live in Lobster tank

Octomom Nadya Suleman has struck a deal with a Whole Foods grocery store located 3 miles from Bellmore, California, for her and 14 children to live in a lobster tank...details pending

(by the way, as far as scientists can tell, Lobsters don't "age", in fact, some believe LOBSTERS CAN LIVE FOREVER...they keep growing thruout their lives..theoretically there may be a 5000 year old, 1 ton lobster out there, they remain fertile and get even more so the older they get, and they seem to only die from accidents/being eaten, etc..seriously,,check out some of these links

Octopuses are thought to be extremely intelligent, some believe them to be as intelligent (in a different way) as dogs

photo of a real 646 pound catfish here

Yo Bishop Holocaust Denier

you are so sure Jesus rose from the dead, but for the Holocaust you say there is not enough evidence?

For the upcoming anniversary of Spitzer's resignation, should I...?

Videotape myself dressed up as tranny hooker and go to Spitzer's Apt building and tell the doorman I am there to see Elliot and wait till I am let up or Elliot comes down

Etta James you are being a douche

I dig your performances and you seem interesting..but YOU DID NOT WRITE THE SONG "AT LAST", AND TONS OF OTHERS HAVE PERFORMED IT before you and after you.